Posts from — December 2007

This post is dedicated to my favorite girl Dena Chulew Below are some memorable photos of her

When I think of Elysse Hamlin I tend to feel emotions ranging from pure hostility to perhaps a sense that I need justice.  When I think of obtaining justice for what Elysse had done to me violence doesn’t even come up as an option. While Elysse deals with her problems buy physically abusing and using her friends I obtain justice my taking the high road. If you’re having trouble following me don’t despair because by the end of this series you will be right with me. Hence, when I think of justice I think of having the power to perhaps never allow such a thing to happen to anyone else. My hope is that if ever another person befriends Elysse Hamlin they will be able to know what she is really all about. There is an old saying that goes something like “If you could have prevented an atrocity and stood by; then you are just as guilty as the person committing the crime.” I intend to not standby, but instead let the world know who the real Elysse Hamlin truly is.

In my last post I talked about Kristin, and today, right now is the time to tackle the real problem so here we go.

Elysse Hamlin and I didn’t click right away. In fact at the start of our early relationship we kind of butted heads a few times. Nothing serious, but she had made some stupid comments about how I didn’t want to walk to the price is right at 5 AM, and to me I just brushed it off. My opinion of her was not changed one way or another for a few weeks since the first time we hung out.

I can’t exactly remember how we started to get close, but I believe that over a few phone calls, and some late night dinners Elysse and I had clicked. To me Elysse presented a challenge because she was a very difficult person to read. Her emotions were almost always concealed, and she only let out a little bit of information. This sparked my attention, and I wanted to get to know Elysse on a grander scale.

It’s important to mention that although my “friendship” feelings for Elysse were growing my romantic feelings for her didn’t change. I looked at her like a brother looks at his sister. We were friends, and at the time I definitely did not want more from her. I bring up the status of our relationship because I truly believe that it has a huge part to play in my enlightenment to the person Elysse Hamlin truly was.

Throughout the first couple months of my friendship with Elysse I dated a number of girls. Obviously, nothing worked out for one reason or another. Since I broke up with Stephanie Dickson I have been very picky who I give my heart too.  I tell you this to explain what I am about to say next because I don’t like to waste my time dating someone for a long time. I know what I want, and if after a few weeks of dating I don’t see it working I usually walk away. As you can imagine this could be a very troublesome process which requires walking a fine line because unlike Elysse I don’t like to screw with people’s hearts.  Elysse never supported me in staying with any of the girls I was with. In fact I felt a sense of her hoping that it would never work out. One time in particular that I remember was when I reunited with a girl I dated a few months back. We had decided to go out on a Friday night and see if we could work our prior issues out.  The next day (which was a Saturday) I receive a phone call from Elysse at around 8:30 AM waking me up asking me “so do you like her?” I don’t know about you, but Saturday is a time for sleep, and if I wanted to know something really badly well I might call the person early… but why would Elysse want to know? There are plenty of stories like this, and I could go on forever.

In my next post which I have already written I will detail how Elysse used my roommate and I on a grand scale. It was important for me to give you some history about my feelings for Elysse and therefore I had to write this. Again, everything that I write in this blog about Elysse is from my own personal perspective.  It’s my own short experience with her, and in no way is the final chapter on the person she truly is.

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Approximately two months ago Lauren, a dear friend of mine introduce her friends Elysse and Kristin to me and my roommate Ari. Obviously this was not a romantic introduction, but it didn’t have to be because I was not attracted to either one of them. If my memory serves me correctly, the night we all met was a rather enjoyable Saturday night. Lauren, Kristin, Elysse, Ari and I hired a taxi and were off to experience LA’s nightlife on Sunset Blvd.

The night was nearing to an end, and to be quite honest I didn’t form an opinion one way or another about Elysse and Kristin. We did however exchange numbers that night because they were new to Los Angeles and made it pretty clear that they wanted to meet new people. I forgot to mention that it just so happened that these new girls lived two blocks up the street from my apartment. Therefore, as we were about to leave the last bar I thought to myself “why not make the effort and extend the hand of friendship to these girls who were my neighbors” A new relationship was formed and we all went home after having a really nice evening.

I decided to get to know Kristin first. There was no particular reason why I did this except for the fact that I talked to her for a longer duration during our first meeting.  I suppose one could argue that making new friends requires giving something of yourself to the other person. Usually it’s making an effort to help a person out by being understanding, providing advice or doing something for them which they could not do for themselves. I guess with Kristin it started off as helping her acquire a parking permit. She didn’t really know where to go, and since I had previously gone to the parking ticket office I decided to help her out.

To me, friendship is never about money or the number of times a person did something for you vs. how many times you did it back. Friendship is a lot of things, but mostly it’s about mutual respect, trust and all the good stuff that comes with it. With Kristin it quickly became a question of how much money she could save by being my friend. A great example would be having me drive everywhere she wanted to go without ever offering to drive. Sometimes it would be the gym and other times it would be getting a bite to eat. At first, I didn’t think to much of it, but I later learned that she didn’t want to spend her “gas money” so I guess I helped her save $3.00.00 whatever it’s not the money to me it’s the principal. The second and perhaps final behavior trait made me not want to ever spend time with her again. I like to call it the “disappearing wallet” let me…. Kristin had a bad habit of saying “opps I forgot my wallet” and guess who had to pay for her? Yes indeed it was I who had to lay out the money almost every time. I want you to understand something, I don’t mind paying for friends every now and then, but trust me when I tell you that this would happened on a consistent basis! In fact after a few weeks Kristin expected me or my roommate to buy her drinks when we went out to bars. Can you know see why I lost respect and a sense of friendship with Kristin? To top it off it was rare where she ever said “Thank You” but that is something I would also discover in Elysse later on.

I don’t want to spend time writing about Kristin.  However, you will see later that Elysse Hamlin is not very different. However,  it did take me a longer time find  out who she really was. The last thing I want to say about Kristin is she probably somewhere inside of herself has a good heart, but for me, it was not worth discovering.

In my next post I will start to write about how Elysse and I developed as friends.

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